There is now a "fatwa" on Alexis Petridis head.

(but you did not hear it from me!)

In today's Independent

By Andy Gill 2 stars out of five
14 May 2004

If I were Morrissey, I think I might be a little more circumspect about recording a song called "The World Is Full of Crashing Bores" - particularly if the album on which it appeared was as underfunded with musical inspiration as the long-awaited You Are the Quarry.
 
This is Morrissey's first new work since 1997's Maladjusted, an album whose feeble puns ("Alma Matters", "Roy's Keen"), self-parodic misery and mechanical riffing suggested a talent in apparently terminal decline. You Are the Quarry simply confirms it: in almost every respect - subject matter, musical settings, language and, particularly, the seemingly oceanic self-pity in which the songs wallow - it could have been made the week after Maladjusted, so infinitesimal is his progress.

Morrissey's current Meltdown-assisted profile will probably ensure it doesn't disappear with quite the same dispatch as its predecessor, but even hardcore fans may baulk at this latest collection of self-serving spite and tired cliché. His costly brushes with m'learned friends clearly still rankle, judging by the frequent sideswipes at "evil legal eagles" and "accountants rampant". "They who wish to hurt you work within the law," he declaims in "The World is Full of Crashing Bores". Butwhat about the teenage hoods so devotedly hymned in "First of the Gang to Die", which adapts Morrissey's rough-boy infatuation to fit his burgeoning Hispanic-American fanbase? Don't they hurt people, too?

Morrissey is now, of course, almost a stateless person, although his seven years in Los Angeles don't appear to have brought any great insight into either his new homeland or his old one. The former is lazily taken to task in "America Is Not the World" with a series of routine critical clichés - Americans are fat pigs, they know nothing of the outside world, their leader is never black, gay or female, etc - punctuated by fulsome expressions of affection for the singer's adopted country. Equally confused and unoriginal is "Come Back to Camden", a compendium of threadbare London clichés (garrulous taxi-drivers, slate-grey Victorian skies, tea that tastes of the Thames) that is so hackneyed one can only conclude Morrissey is actually turning into an American.

Which would perhaps be for the best, judging by his raking-over of the tired old Union Jack controversy in "Irish Blood, English Heart", an account of Englishness somewhat weakened by Morrissey's misapprehension that the Royals hold Cromwell - the same one, you'll recall, who had Charles I's head chopped off - in high esteem. Alas, not only is he still fighting battles that everyone else has long ago forgotten, he's fighting them in almost identical terms, lyrically and musically, as he did a decade ago

These vicious screeds posed as "reviews" are to be expected, I would guess, from such simple minds with an ax to grind.
Morrissey's "You Are The Quarry" blows away most of the crap put out on a daily basis in England or America.

The strange thing about Morrissey's appearance in the Guardian review is that on one page it is given 2 out of 5 and then on a subsequent page which features an advert of YATQ- it has a endorsement from the NME and The Guardian (??) which says "Quarry is up there with his best solo work"

A bit odd...

My word, John Harris has a lot of alter egos.

What interests me is not so much that these people give horrid reviews (tasteless fools), but that they seem to take a sadistic pleasure in dissing Morrissey. It's almost like watching some evil little kid pull the wings off of a butterfly because it's prettier than he is...

I can understand why Morrissey could get under people's skin, but honestly, can you think of another performer that critics take such a delight in shooting down? I wonder.

There's a theme to all the bad reviews which seems to be more obvious with each one: if you're expecting Morrissey to be in his late 20's again, writing all the youthful evocative and poetic lyrics of that time of his career, you will be sorely disappointed (as are these reviewers, which are at the moment dwarfed by the good reviews). If you're satisfied with the distinct differences between Moz's solo work to his time with the Smiths, you're likely to find a lot to like about the new record. It's up to who you are as a listener. But with MOJO, RS, NME, and so many others have had great things to say about it, looks like this Tuesday will be a lot of fun for many of us.

that some critics are complaining he is stuck in the past whilst at the same time moaning that he's not as good as he was with The Smiths.

Bless their confused little brains.

I don't even care if YATQ isn't his so-called "best" ever, because even mediocre Morrissey, if there is such a thing, is so much more honest, true, and lovely than everything else on the radio and in the music stores that I, for one, am simply glad.

This review from the Guardian perfectly captures my initial thoughts about this dismal album. I'm glad to see Morrissey return, but honestly, there are possibly three good songs on the whole album.

I think this review is well written and thought out and fundamentally fair. He makes a good argument, and I agree with much of what he says.

I have read the review by Poodropolis, and it's really very strange. He says too many good things about the album for the 2/5 thing to be realistic. He trying to make a point/trying to be "different". Okay the drumming is a bit annoying on one of the songs "I Like You" I think, but he's going way over the top.
I love the Guardian so such an unfair, slanted review is a real let-down for me and I will regard the motives of this paper's reviewers with far more suspicion in future. Are they really trying to say that YATQ is worse that these gems reviewed in the same supplement (Graham Coxon [loser from Blur]: Happiness in magazines 3/5) (Ash [formerly good band]: Meltdown 3/5) (The Charlatans [dried-up deadbeats:] Up at the Lake 4/5 un-fucking-believable)(Alanis Morissette [Nuff said]: So-Called Supposed Former Jagged Rug Swept Under Chaos Little Pill Junkie is still Infatuated 3/5) (D12 [who the fuck r u??]: D12 world 3/5?)?
Grow up my friend, grow up.

I am a rabid Smiths/Moz fan. Saw the Smiths live back on the Pier in NYC (yes, I'm old). I also had the pleasure of ending a Moz show at the NJ Garden State Arts Center in the early 90s by tackling his holiness. That said, I also agree that this record is very weak, mostly due to his well below average musicians. I know this has been said before. How many years has it been since they've been collaborating with Moz? 15? Given the opportunity, just about any schmuck with guitar could come up with a few hits for a talent like Morrissey within 15 years. Why on earth do you think Moz is so attached to this musically challenged foursome?

It's just the view of one journalist at the end of the day, he doesn't speak for the views of everyone at the Guardian. A different Guardian journalist interviewed Morrissey last month and that journalist said YATQ was up there with his best solo work. I'm sorry to see this poor review of the album but it's just one person's opinion. The paper doesn't have a vendetta against him, as shown by the overall very positive write up they gave him in the April interview. I just wish Dorian Lynskey (who did the April interview) had also written the album review, rather than Alexis Petridis!