Morrissey A-Z: "Girl Least Likely To"

I’ve always wondered what Morrissey would put on his toast....
Jam I could only imagine...
I've no idea what Morrissey puts on his toast, but Johnny Marr-mite.
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According to Mozipedia – or PJLM –, Girl least likely to is about a Moz friend and, when she listened the song, she noticed it was about her.

Doees anyone have a clue who is it about?
 
This is one of those songs I listen to and feel like it's not very good, but it's also one of my favourite, I don't really know why. I think it's the stream of consciousness style to the song, it feels like it could never stop.
 
Great lyrics wasted on this poor excuse of a song. Everything goes downhill after "And the scales of justice sway one way..." ironically. I admire Morrissey's adamancy to keep on singing. A prosodic nightmare.
 
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