actually, now that I have been so vocal about my desire to stay clean and sober for at least 90 days
well, many of the people I go to clubs with have been quite supportive
as well as most of my co workers, most are use to me smiling which I despise doing now
I must fix my teeth and I simply cannot go through with the 3 scheduled root canals in mid july(I'd like to do them on the old date of my former anniversary since I am gonna be in pain anyways
)
but all this depends on me massively reducing the amount of pain reliever necessary to do the operations
also, reading back to the honest responses about ugliness, thank you all, I know I was not alone in feeling this here, and I hope a path to not being ugly(or at least our feeling much less ugly) is open to all
2nd to lastly, Scarlet I. mentioned the high standard for beauty her at Moz Solo, omg! how I beg to differ, its nothing like the Goth clubs of L.A. in which simply everyone is beautiful
and for a while I got by here in the S.F. ones where its only around 75-80 % real pretty people, but with the tooth loss and the just way too many people staring at me like I dont belong, well, it just got to me is all
still, I suppose I get, in theory, where Scarlet I. is coming from, I have just not lived in the world of "normal looking people" for a long, long, long time maybe
ps: I really did not make this thread to read anyone say nice things about me, thanks and all, but I do, sort of, skip right through those comments