"List of the Lost" physical copy picture posted by @ariel_mcdowall / Twitter

Let's face it - a first time novel from a 56 year old was always going to be an uphill struggle - especially if he hasn't allowed an editor to tone down any tortured syntax and unwieldy sentence construction. This bears all the signs of being a car-crash, but I'm looking forward to reading it, just to find out. Presumably if it gets critically savaged, and flops in the charts (though like me, I expect many people will buy it out of morbid curiosity), Moz will try and shift the blame elsewhere. If it bombs, expect the band to be wearing 'f*** Penguin Books' on forthcoming tour dates. :)
 
If you think about it, with 'Autobiography', Morrissey was only competing in the rockstar / celebrity autobiography genre, most of which are ghostwriten and have practically no literary merit at all. The bar is set very low, so even though 'Autobiography' had issues with run on sentences, the rambling nature of the second half of the book, pages wasted on moaning about the court case and chart positions, etc - there was enough in there of literary merit that it still comfortably outshone pretty much anything else in it's genre. It may not be great, but it's easily one of the greatest rockstar memoirs of all time.

With 'List of the Lost', Morrissey is entering the realm of literary fiction - and suddenly the bar is very high. He's no longer competing against Keith Richards, Rod Stewart, Jordan and co. but with Joyce, Dickens, Wilde, etc. I don't think the critics are going to give him a 'free pass' this time, but put the boot in. At this high level, things as basic as shoddy sentence construction just won't be accepted. If it's anything less than great, he's going to get a critical mauling.

It's a big, and brave jump from Mozzer. I doubt he will stick the landing, but it's going to be fun to watch him try.
 
Let's face it - a first time novel from a 56 year old was always going to be an uphill struggle - especially if he hasn't allowed an editor to tone down any tortured syntax and unwieldy sentence construction. This bears all the signs of being a car-crash, but I'm looking forward to reading it, just to find out. Presumably if it gets critically savaged, and flops in the charts (though like me, I expect many people will buy it out of morbid curiosity), Moz will try and shift the blame elsewhere. If it bombs, expect the band to be wearing 'f*** Penguin Books' on forthcoming tour dates. :)

I think you're right on the money there. Sadly I feel a lot of the reviews will portray a 'should have stuck to writing songs' subtext
 
Let's face it - a first time novel from a 56 year old was always going to be an uphill struggle - especially if he hasn't allowed an editor to tone down any tortured syntax and unwieldy sentence construction. This bears all the signs of being a car-crash, but I'm looking forward to reading it, just to find out. Presumably if it gets critically savaged, and flops in the charts (though like me, I expect many people will buy it out of morbid curiosity), Moz will try and shift the blame elsewhere. If it bombs, expect the band to be wearing 'f*** Penguin Books' on forthcoming tour dates. :)

It will be interesting to see if there is any advertising, tube posters etc. Looks like there are healthy stocks in bookshops - presumably publishers can pay to have books stacked 'out front' etc...
 
Actually, everyone, this is what the novel is about:

It will begin in the North of that once great, now desecrated nation we call England. The humdrum towns, the steel mills, the ceaseless rain, the session musicians stealing money from your own pocket. In this provincial setting, a young man of rare precocity comes into the world. He is called Morrissey Wilde and is to be referred to throughout the book by his full name. Every sentence of the novel will feature his name. This is what is known as originality.*
Morrissey Wilde is the son to nobody’s mother, progeny of a motherless mother, child of some other body’s mother. Unlike Romulus and Remus, he suckles at the teat not of a wolf, for that would be a senseless desecration of a noble beast, but of a woman beaten down by England, a woman labouring under Thatcher’s yolk. The novel will be illustrated with deliberately crude illustrations made by my houseboy Manuelo, of the so-called “Lady” Thatcher eating the mangled corpses of orphaned working class llamas.
Morrissey Wilde casts off the shackles of his provincial childhood and trudges, a knapsack on his shoulder, down the old way to England’s ancient capital, which I will refer to as “that squalid desecrator of dreams, London” in every sentence of the novel. Once again, I will remind you that this is what is known as originality and who are you to question an artist? Did you write “A Rush and a Push and the Land is ours”? No, you did not.*
With his best friend, a Burberry-clad lout named Daz, Morrissey Wilde sets out to find himself. Daz represents what is great about Britain. He is a muscular, monosyllabic vegan who regularly strikes royalists with his preferred weapon, the brick.
There will be a section of around 90 pages set in an abattoir, in which Morrissey Wilde lives among the cows until he teaches them how to talk and they rise up against their owners, David and Victoria Peckham, a footballer and his idiot mistress wife. Eventually, the cows tie the Peckhams up and drag them to the edge of the local village, where the chief Cow, Daisy, asks Mr Peckham if he can pick a harp out of a line-up of household implements. Mr Peckham cannot and so the villagers flog him and his wife. Morrissey Wilde sees this and cries for the beauty of the world.
I will include a 30-page freeform poem about Morrissey Wilde’s abhorrent grandmother and her flour-stained hands. This will segue naturally into a chapter in which the protagonist gets a job in a McDonald’s, which is run by the Norwegian fascist Anders Breivik. *Together, Breivik, a strong but silent seer who is revealed to love his own mother, and Morrissey Wilde, take down the murderous burger company from the inside by exposing the company’s CEO, David Cameron, for being the stag-shooting toff he is. In a violently poetic scene, Morrissey Wilde and Breivik tie Mr Cameron up and force-feed him a live cow until he chokes to death. They then make burgers from Mr Cameron’s corpse and serve them to the board of directors of McDonald’s, two former musicians from Manchester.*
For this service to society, our hero must do hard time in prison but, with the help of a group of bare-chested Latin American freedom fighters, Morrissey Wilde escapes and topples the corrupt government of this supposedly “united” kingdom. In the climactic scene, the protagonist gets England’s Queen, the monster Elizabeth, to publically admit that she is a carnivorous cadaver, a walking cyborg who steals from all around her. She is then executed on the balcony of her palace, along with all her family. England is restored to its former glory, with Morrissey Wilde serving as leader. Daz, his faithful companion, is his right-hand man and his cabinet is made-up of a wise old Pig, the talking cows and the bare-chested Latin American freedom fighters.*
The novel will be sold at the market rate: £199.99. I will only accept praise on the cover from the following men: Shakespeare, David Johansen, Oscar Fingal O'Flahertie Wills Wilde, Heinrich Himmler, Nigel Farage.*
*
There it is.
*
Morrissey
Los Angeles, California
 
Riiigghhht.....so you won't be reading any reviews, because they're all irrelevant. Gotcha. Something tells me if the early doors signs were good, you wouldn't be saying this, and you're laying the floor for the sadness to come. But, you know, very few of us have read it. We're all free to go to Amazon, iBooks, etc and leave our reviews. But I get you won't be reading them. I'll be reading it in the next couple of days, and making my own mind up. Just like you suggest. Hundreds of others will too. Some will post reviews. Their 'irrelevant' reviews.

I can honestly say, hand on heart, that I have never read a review of a Morrissey LP, nor did I read any reviews on his autobiography. I, like you, will read this novel purely and simply because it is written by our hero, the man whose lyrical genius has made our lives far richer than the lives of an Olly Murs fan. We all fell in love with this man because his words spoke to us - you have lost sight of that in recent years, P, so perhaps you will approach List of the Lost in a positive frame of mind rather than a negative, but somehow I already feel I know what your review will be like - not that I will read it! You'll miss him when he's gone.

R
 
Actually, everyone, this is what the novel is about:

It will begin in the North of that once great, now desecrated nation we call England. The humdrum towns, the steel mills, the ceaseless rain, the session musicians stealing money from your own pocket. In this provincial setting, a young man of rare precocity comes into the world. He is called Morrissey Wilde and is to be referred to throughout the book by his full name. Every sentence of the novel will feature his name. This is what is known as originality.*
Morrissey Wilde is the son to nobody’s mother, progeny of a motherless mother, child of some other body’s mother. Unlike Romulus and Remus, he suckles at the teat not of a wolf, for that would be a senseless desecration of a noble beast, but of a woman beaten down by England, a woman labouring under Thatcher’s yolk. The novel will be illustrated with deliberately crude illustrations made by my houseboy Manuelo, of the so-called “Lady” Thatcher eating the mangled corpses of orphaned working class llamas.
Morrissey Wilde casts off the shackles of his provincial childhood and trudges, a knapsack on his shoulder, down the old way to England’s ancient capital, which I will refer to as “that squalid desecrator of dreams, London” in every sentence of the novel. Once again, I will remind you that this is what is known as originality and who are you to question an artist? Did you write “A Rush and a Push and the Land is ours”? No, you did not.*
With his best friend, a Burberry-clad lout named Daz, Morrissey Wilde sets out to find himself. Daz represents what is great about Britain. He is a muscular, monosyllabic vegan who regularly strikes royalists with his preferred weapon, the brick.
There will be a section of around 90 pages set in an abattoir, in which Morrissey Wilde lives among the cows until he teaches them how to talk and they rise up against their owners, David and Victoria Peckham, a footballer and his idiot mistress wife. Eventually, the cows tie the Peckhams up and drag them to the edge of the local village, where the chief Cow, Daisy, asks Mr Peckham if he can pick a harp out of a line-up of household implements. Mr Peckham cannot and so the villagers flog him and his wife. Morrissey Wilde sees this and cries for the beauty of the world.
I will include a 30-page freeform poem about Morrissey Wilde’s abhorrent grandmother and her flour-stained hands. This will segue naturally into a chapter in which the protagonist gets a job in a McDonald’s, which is run by the Norwegian fascist Anders Breivik. *Together, Breivik, a strong but silent seer who is revealed to love his own mother, and Morrissey Wilde, take down the murderous burger company from the inside by exposing the company’s CEO, David Cameron, for being the stag-shooting toff he is. In a violently poetic scene, Morrissey Wilde and Breivik tie Mr Cameron up and force-feed him a live cow until he chokes to death. They then make burgers from Mr Cameron’s corpse and serve them to the board of directors of McDonald’s, two former musicians from Manchester.*
For this service to society, our hero must do hard time in prison but, with the help of a group of bare-chested Latin American freedom fighters, Morrissey Wilde escapes and topples the corrupt government of this supposedly “united” kingdom. In the climactic scene, the protagonist gets England’s Queen, the monster Elizabeth, to publically admit that she is a carnivorous cadaver, a walking cyborg who steals from all around her. She is then executed on the balcony of her palace, along with all her family. England is restored to its former glory, with Morrissey Wilde serving as leader. Daz, his faithful companion, is his right-hand man and his cabinet is made-up of a wise old Pig, the talking cows and the bare-chested Latin American freedom fighters.*
The novel will be sold at the market rate: £199.99. I will only accept praise on the cover from the following men: Shakespeare, David Johansen, Oscar Fingal O'Flahertie Wills Wilde, Heinrich Himmler, Nigel Farage.*
*
There it is.
*
Morrissey
Los Angeles, California

It's apparently 118 pages long. So, no.
 
Given that the first paragraph of Autobiography was four and a half pages long, I'm interested to see how this is going to pan out at a meagre 118 pages or whatever it is.

I know I'll love it, because I love pretty much everything Morrissey does, despite how bonkers he's become in his old age. He's absolutely eccentric and ridiculous, and all of my friends think I'm absolutely eccentric and ridiculous for being obsessed with him, but no other pop star can make me feel the way Morrissey does, so I know that even if this novel is complete gibberish, I'll probably still enjoy reading it because it's Morrissey.
 
From tty, just now ~

http://true-to-you.net/morrissey_news_150923_03

Morrissey's novel List of the Lost is published this Thursday, 24 September, by Penguin Books (UK).

List of the Lost is available in paperback and ebook formats.

Morrissey has explained:

"The theme is demonology ... the left-handed path of black magic. It is about a sports relay team in 1970s America who accidentally kill a wretch who, in esoteric language, might be known as a Fetch ... a discarnate entity in physical form. He appears, though, as an omen of the immediate deaths of each member of the relay team. He is a life force of a devil incarnate, yet in his astral shell he is one phase removed from life. The wretch begins a banishing ritual of the four main characters, and therefore his own death at the beginning of the book is illusory."


Well, blow me...
 
From tty, just now ~

http://true-to-you.net/morrissey_news_150923_03

Morrissey's novel List of the Lost is published this Thursday, 24 September, by Penguin Books (UK).

List of the Lost is available in paperback and ebook formats.

Morrissey has explained:

"The theme is demonology ... the left-handed path of black magic. It is about a sports relay team in 1970s America who accidentally kill a wretch who, in esoteric language, might be known as a Fetch ... a discarnate entity in physical form. He appears, though, as an omen of the immediate deaths of each member of the relay team. He is a life force of a devil incarnate, yet in his astral shell he is one phase removed from life. The wretch begins a banishing ritual of the four main characters, and therefore his own death at the beginning of the book is illusory."


Well, blow me...
He has been watching supernatural. In a millions years...............
 
Actually, everyone, this is what the novel is about:

It will begin in the North of that once great, now desecrated nation we call England. The humdrum towns, the steel mills, the ceaseless rain, the session musicians stealing money from your own pocket. In this provincial setting, a young man of rare precocity comes into the world. He is called Morrissey Wilde and is to be referred to throughout the book by his full name. Every sentence of the novel will feature his name. This is what is known as originality.*
Morrissey Wilde is the son to nobody’s mother, progeny of a motherless mother, child of some other body’s mother. Unlike Romulus and Remus, he suckles at the teat not of a wolf, for that would be a senseless desecration of a noble beast, but of a woman beaten down by England, a woman labouring under Thatcher’s yolk. The novel will be illustrated with deliberately crude illustrations made by my houseboy Manuelo, of the so-called “Lady” Thatcher eating the mangled corpses of orphaned working class llamas.
Morrissey Wilde casts off the shackles of his provincial childhood and trudges, a knapsack on his shoulder, down the old way to England’s ancient capital, which I will refer to as “that squalid desecrator of dreams, London” in every sentence of the novel. Once again, I will remind you that this is what is known as originality and who are you to question an artist? Did you write “A Rush and a Push and the Land is ours”? No, you did not.*
With his best friend, a Burberry-clad lout named Daz, Morrissey Wilde sets out to find himself. Daz represents what is great about Britain. He is a muscular, monosyllabic vegan who regularly strikes royalists with his preferred weapon, the brick.
There will be a section of around 90 pages set in an abattoir, in which Morrissey Wilde lives among the cows until he teaches them how to talk and they rise up against their owners, David and Victoria Peckham, a footballer and his idiot mistress wife. Eventually, the cows tie the Peckhams up and drag them to the edge of the local village, where the chief Cow, Daisy, asks Mr Peckham if he can pick a harp out of a line-up of household implements. Mr Peckham cannot and so the villagers flog him and his wife. Morrissey Wilde sees this and cries for the beauty of the world.
I will include a 30-page freeform poem about Morrissey Wilde’s abhorrent grandmother and her flour-stained hands. This will segue naturally into a chapter in which the protagonist gets a job in a McDonald’s, which is run by the Norwegian fascist Anders Breivik. *Together, Breivik, a strong but silent seer who is revealed to love his own mother, and Morrissey Wilde, take down the murderous burger company from the inside by exposing the company’s CEO, David Cameron, for being the stag-shooting toff he is. In a violently poetic scene, Morrissey Wilde and Breivik tie Mr Cameron up and force-feed him a live cow until he chokes to death. They then make burgers from Mr Cameron’s corpse and serve them to the board of directors of McDonald’s, two former musicians from Manchester.*
For this service to society, our hero must do hard time in prison but, with the help of a group of bare-chested Latin American freedom fighters, Morrissey Wilde escapes and topples the corrupt government of this supposedly “united” kingdom. In the climactic scene, the protagonist gets England’s Queen, the monster Elizabeth, to publically admit that she is a carnivorous cadaver, a walking cyborg who steals from all around her. She is then executed on the balcony of her palace, along with all her family. England is restored to its former glory, with Morrissey Wilde serving as leader. Daz, his faithful companion, is his right-hand man and his cabinet is made-up of a wise old Pig, the talking cows and the bare-chested Latin American freedom fighters.*
The novel will be sold at the market rate: £199.99. I will only accept praise on the cover from the following men: Shakespeare, David Johansen, Oscar Fingal O'Flahertie Wills Wilde, Heinrich Himmler, Nigel Farage.*
*
There it is.
*
Morrissey
Los Angeles, California
Give me your contact info, we are turning this into a book regardless what morrisseys book is really about.
 
From tty, just now ~

http://true-to-you.net/morrissey_news_150923_03

Morrissey's novel List of the Lost is published this Thursday, 24 September, by Penguin Books (UK).

List of the Lost is available in paperback and ebook formats.

Morrissey has explained:

"The theme is demonology ... the left-handed path of black magic. It is about a sports relay team in 1970s America who accidentally kill a wretch who, in esoteric language, might be known as a Fetch ... a discarnate entity in physical form. He appears, though, as an omen of the immediate deaths of each member of the relay team. He is a life force of a devil incarnate, yet in his astral shell he is one phase removed from life. The wretch begins a banishing ritual of the four main characters, and therefore his own death at the beginning of the book is illusory."


Well, blow me...

I would have preferred a one act play about eating toast, frankly...
 
From tty, just now ~

http://true-to-you.net/morrissey_news_150923_03

Morrissey's novel List of the Lost is published this Thursday, 24 September, by Penguin Books (UK).

List of the Lost is available in paperback and ebook formats.

Morrissey has explained:

"The theme is demonology ... the left-handed path of black magic. It is about a sports relay team in 1970s America who accidentally kill a wretch who, in esoteric language, might be known as a Fetch ... a discarnate entity in physical form. He appears, though, as an omen of the immediate deaths of each member of the relay team. He is a life force of a devil incarnate, yet in his astral shell he is one phase removed from life. The wretch begins a banishing ritual of the four main characters, and therefore his own death at the beginning of the book is illusory."


Well, blow me...

ahhh. so, its about a gay demon that runs amok among a group of gay sprinters who dress up as the cartwrights to hide from him. go it.
 
From tty, just now ~

http://true-to-you.net/morrissey_news_150923_03

Morrissey's novel List of the Lost is published this Thursday, 24 September, by Penguin Books (UK).

List of the Lost is available in paperback and ebook formats.

Morrissey has explained:

"The theme is demonology ... the left-handed path of black magic. It is about a sports relay team in 1970s America who accidentally kill a wretch who, in esoteric language, might be known as a Fetch ... a discarnate entity in physical form. He appears, though, as an omen of the immediate deaths of each member of the relay team. He is a life force of a devil incarnate, yet in his astral shell he is one phase removed from life. The wretch begins a banishing ritual of the four main characters, and therefore his own death at the beginning of the book is illusory."


Well, blow me...

I take back every roll of the eyes I've given one of CrystalGeezer's shamanistic, star gazing, tarot card posts to do with Moz...
 
I take back every roll of the eyes I've given one of CrystalGeezer's shamanistic, star gazing, tarot card posts to do with Moz...

:cool:
 

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