What do Lance Armstrong and Adolf Hitler have in common?

Thanks...

A man decides to have a face-lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really good about the results. On his way home, he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper.

Before leaving, he says to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"

"About 35," was the reply.

"I'm actually 47," the man says, feeling really happy.

After that, he goes into McDonalds for lunch and asks the clerk the same question.

The reply is, "Oh, you look about 29".

"I am actually 47."

Later, while standing at a bus stop, he asks an old woman the same question.

She replies, "I am 85 years old, and my eyesight is going. But when I was young, there was a sure way of telling a man's age. If I put my hand down your pants and play with your balls for 10 minutes, I will be able to tell you your exact age."

As there was no one around, the man thinks, What the hell and lets her slip her hand down his pants.

Ten minutes later, the old lady says, "Okay, it's done. You are 47."

Stunned, the man says, "That was brilliant. How did you do that?"

The old lady replies, "I was behind you at McDonalds."


for turning this to All Things Smutty Thread. :D
 
A lad at school lost one due to alcohol poisoning - he drank too much white lightening when he was 14 - woke up next morning with a swelling - mum took him to the doctors - rushed him to hospital - left with only one testicle - poor lad.

They offered him a plastic one to make it look more balanced, but he turned them down - now, whilst meat and two veg isn't the prettiest sight, meat and one veg looks bizarre.

To top it all off, he was ginger...poor lad, ginger pubes, one ball, no chance.
 
They offered him a plastic one to make it look more balanced, but he turned them down - now, whilst meat and two veg isn't the prettiest sight, meat and one veg looks bizarre.

To top it all off, he was ginger...poor lad, ginger pubes, one ball, no chance.

You seem to have gotten quite a good look at his package. Did he show it off for money or something? :D
 
stretch_armstrong.jpg

Hahahahahahaha! :D
 
My grandfather had only 1 ball and he had 8 children. I don't see that much of a problem. I mean, the problem should only be in fertility, right? IN his case it didn't interfere at all. :D

I didn't know Lance Armstrong only had 1. haha Learnt something new today.
 
You'd like to cause a diplomatic row? :eek:

Well it's a fact. Hiltler's Germany ruled France, as did Lance in the Tour de France quite a few times.
Different sport, same result;)

Both Hitler and Lance rode down the Champs Elyesse celebrating victory.

Jukebox Jury
 
I was kind of disappointed that it isn't actually on display in the Albert Hall. I was expecting to see it on a purple cushion, housed in a 4x4 glass box.
 
I was kind of disappointed that it isn't actually on display in the Albert Hall. I was expecting to see it on a purple cushion, housed in a 4x4 glass box.

According to NRitH, you can find Rasputin's penis in a glass jar from google search. :p
 
They were/are both highly competitive and driven individuals...

P.S. What purpoted to be Napoleon's cock went on auction a few years back I seem to recall...
 
Tags
mr. internot wedding tackle
Back
Top Bottom