Andy Andy Andy... I went to the official Andy Rourke site to see what the fuss was about; and you've made over 200 posts, I read the sad one where Mr. Rourke scowled at you when he saw you smiling at him, and then had you and your friend BANNED from Triffords- and Andy and the other Smith (can never remember his name) were laughing at you from inside. And you STILL call him a kind and gentle man? WAKE UP! There is someone out there for you who is kind and sweet and will take you to nice places and will be entirely happy being in your presence without saying a word. There ARE nice, handsome, or nice looking in YOUR eyes, men in the world, who would give almost anything to be with you. Give up on this Andy Rourke thing. He's already shown his displeasure and shock when he sees you; that should tell you something. Also, if you don't want to see a doctor, at least consider the thought of talking to a therapist, NO not a psychiatrist, therapists will be kind and listen to whatever you have to say and they will help tremendously.