Scar Tissue

I can`t sleep again.I find myself sleeping less and less lately.I just feel this sadness creeping further and further inside of me.I feel it burning deep down in my stomach.It fills me with pain and anxiety.I can`t sleep.I can`t breathe.I want to sleep forever because that`s the only time I have peace.I just want out of this body and this brain because I can`t stand it anymore.I feel like crying all the time but I won`t let myself because it would prove how weak I really am.I don`t want to be like this anymore.Well I guess I never really wanted to be like this at all.I just don`t know how to fix it.I try to make it better the only way I know how.But no matter how deep I cut I know it will never go away.I know that`s only a temporary solution and soon you have to do it again.And the relief it brings you gets shorter and shorter.All you have left is an ugly scar to remind you of why you needed to do it in the first place.I feel this pain and hurt deep down in my heart.I don`t want much from this life I just want to be happy and feel like I belong somewhere.I`ve never felt like I`ve belonged anywhere.

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I Get So Lost Sometimes Days Pass And This Emptiness Fills My Heart
~Peter Gabriel~