fao sheelagh

D

domestos salad

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I am remarkably suprised at the amount of self restraint you have exhibited in your dealings with that freeyourself person.It is most unlike you and I am quite proud of you.Same cannot be said for Mr Smith unfotunately!
 
Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got, I'm just Just Mr. Smith from the block....

I think Mr. Smith has been quite restrained, in consideration of the fact he's been threatned with a screwdriver, suppose I'm used to that were I'm from...
 
Re: Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got, I'm just Just Mr. Smith from the block....

> I think Mr. Smith has been quite restrained, in consideration of the fact
> he's been threatned with a screwdriver, suppose I'm used to that were I'm
> from...
Well I suppose so but isnt it time you went home for din-dins?You must have finished a hard days dossing by now!btw that nasty freeyourself swore at me .Should I be scared or should I just tell my mummy?
 
Re: Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got, I'm just Just Mr. Smith from the block....

I know how freeyourself likes dictionaries and references so much so I had planned to look up his name and give him the meaning as a surprise but for some reason I couldn't find "f***wit". So instead I decided to leave him alone and let him get back to his cup o bovril and writing his weekly complaints to various public companies regarding shoddy customer service and dangerous pointy edges on products.
 
FAO 'Mr. Smith', the bog-eyed bed-wetter

> I know how freeyourself likes dictionaries and references so much so I had
> planned to look up his name and give him the meaning as a surprise but for
> some reason I couldn't find "f***wit". So instead I decided to
> leave him alone and let him get back to his cup o bovril and writing his
> weekly complaints to various public companies regarding shoddy customer
> service and dangerous pointy edges on products.

If you really wanna surprise me, you could send me a picture of one single solitary person you've had any kind of sexual relations with.

Nevermind surprise me, that would f***ing astonish me!

By 'sexual relations', I don't mean your Dad.

That's if your Mother has told you who he is yet.

You see I have you down as some kind of filthy little peeping Tom, spying on your sister as she has her annual bath, & masturbating furiously while she rummages for the soap.

Might I suggest you exchange your current 'Diedre Barlow style' specs for some slightly more fashionable ones, apply a recommended cream / ointment to your acne-ravaged face, gargle with a strong mouthwash, as halitosis can be most off-putting & bathe occasionally & wash your fetid & foul smelling clothes more often than twice a year.

Hope I've been of some assistance, I do like to help those less fortunate than myself.
 
Re: FAO 'Mr. Smith', the bog-eyed bed-wetter

What have I told you about that temper. It looks like we're going to have to try something different. I suggest you seek professional help to deal with the sort of issues you have just graphically described for all and sundry to read. You shouldn't feel ashamed at having these thoughts - I just hope you haven't acted on them. I also think its pretty unfair of you to project your warped fantasies onto Mr. Smith.

And there was me giving you credit for being somewhat intelligent and articulate. I really thought we were making progress, and then you go and do something like this. Never fear. I'll always be here to point you in the right direction, and offer some constructive criticism.

My tip for today is: Try redirecting that anger by having a good long run, followed by a good long cry. You should also, I feel, be less free in your use of obscenities as it makes you appear like a jibbering idiot, frothing at the mouth

Love and Kisses

A helpful soul.
 
Have I upset you freeyouself?

Coz ye sound upset! Hope I haven't spoiled your evening of sitting and wondering "why?". I know you wanted a picture of somebody I've had sexual 'relations' (classic by the way) with but its just not that kind of chatroom mate, anyway its too hard for me to take a picture of my right hand using just my left hand! You should know that, afterall I do get the impression you type with one hand only occasionally pausing to re-position yer web-cam like. Anyway better go, its nearly time for Eastenders...
 
Re: FAO 'Mr. Smith', the bog-eyed bed-wetter

> What have I told you about that temper. It looks like we're going to have
> to try something different. I suggest you seek professional help to deal
> with the sort of issues you have just graphically described for all and
> sundry to read. You shouldn't feel ashamed at having these thoughts - I
> just hope you haven't acted on them. I also think its pretty unfair of you
> to project your warped fantasies onto Mr. Smith.

> And there was me giving you credit for being somewhat intelligent and
> articulate. I really thought we were making progress, and then you go and
> do something like this. Never fear. I'll always be here to point you in
> the right direction, and offer some constructive criticism.

> My tip for today is: Try redirecting that anger by having a good long run,
> followed by a good long cry. You should also, I feel, be less free in your
> use of obscenities as it makes you appear like a jibbering idiot, frothing
> at the mouth

> Love and Kisses

> A helpful soul.

I've got a better idea.

Why don't you enlist the services of an experienced rent boy/female prostitute, whichever you prefer, & rid yourself of all that sexual tension.

Perhaps then you wouldn't feel the need to continually follow me around this Board, fantasising about sleeping with me & dreaming of being me.

The two things are not necessarily mutually exclusive.

And wash your hands after visiting the bathroom.
 
Re: Have I upset you freeyouself?

> Coz ye sound upset! Hope I haven't spoiled your evening of sitting and
> wondering "why?". I know you wanted a picture of somebody I've
> had sexual 'relations' (classic by the way) with but its just not that
> kind of chatroom mate, anyway its too hard for me to take a picture of my
> right hand using just my left hand! You should know that, afterall I do
> get the impression you type with one hand only occasionally pausing to
> re-position yer web-cam like. Anyway better go, its nearly time for
> Eastenders...

See.

Both your previous post & this prove you can actually cobble a sentence together, providing you get some help from your dead grandparents.

btw, the 'sitting and wondering "why?" ' jibe...nice one Centurion, like it.
 
Re: FAO 'Mr. Smith', the bog-eyed bed-wetter

> If you really wanna surprise me, you could send me a picture of one single
> solitary person you've had any kind of sexual relations with.

> Nevermind surprise me, that would f***ing astonish me!

> By 'sexual relations', I don't mean your Dad.

> That's if your Mother has told you who he is yet.

> You see I have you down as some kind of filthy little peeping Tom, spying
> on your sister as she has her annual bath, & masturbating furiously
> while she rummages for the soap.

> Might I suggest you exchange your current 'Diedre Barlow style' specs for
> some slightly more fashionable ones, apply a recommended cream / ointment
> to your acne-ravaged face, gargle with a strong mouthwash, as halitosis
> can be most off-putting & bathe occasionally & wash your fetid
> & foul smelling clothes more often than twice a year.

> Hope I've been of some assistance, I do like to help those less fortunate
> than myself.
It takes one to know one,you know!
 
Re: Have I upset you freeyouself?

> See.

> Both your previous post & this prove you can actually cobble a
> sentence together, providing you get some help from your dead
> grandparents.

> btw, the 'sitting and wondering "why?" ' jibe...nice one
> Centurion, like it.

"Centurion"...needn't be bringin the romans into this! Your just angry at everyone aren't ye?
 
Re: FAO 'Mr. Smith', the bog-eyed bed-wetter

> It takes one to know one,you know!

Yeah, you'd know toad boy.
 
Re: FAO 'Mr. Smith', the bog-eyed bed-wetter

> It takes one to know one,you know!

Don't upset him now Boy Racer, he'll start havin a go at your dead relatives, I bet he's crying while he's typing! Gentle little whimpers...flickin between the online dictionary and moz-solo, gently spilling tears on his vintage 70's dr.spock outfit he only wears when he's logging on to his hi-tec workstation which he has named "the enterprise".
 
Re: FAO 'Mr. Smith', the bog-eyed bed-wetter

> Don't upset him now Boy Racer, he'll start havin a go at your dead
> relatives, I bet he's crying while he's typing! Gentle little
> whimpers...flickin between the online dictionary and moz-solo, gently
> spilling tears on his vintage 70's dr.spock outfit he only wears when he's
> logging on to his hi-tec workstation which he has named "the
> enterprise".

It's a pity that this thread has been shoved halfway down the page, meaning that no-one will know just how witty & clever your baby sister can be on her Speak-and-Spell.

See what I mean about those pesky *NM* posting simpletons now?
 
Re: FAO 'Mr. Smith', the bog-eyed bed-wetter

> Don't upset him now Boy Racer, he'll start havin a go at your dead
> relatives, I bet he's crying while he's typing! Gentle little
> whimpers...flickin between the online dictionary and moz-solo, gently
> spilling tears on his vintage 70's dr.spock outfit he only wears when he's
> logging on to his hi-tec workstation which he has named "the
> enterprise".
Bit disappointed with his last comeback though,I expected more hatred than that.Maybe hes used up his daily quota,always tomorrow.
 
Re: FAO 'Mr. Smith', the bog-eyed bed-wetter

> It's a pity that this thread has been shoved halfway down the page,
> meaning that no-one will know just how witty & clever your baby sister
> can be on her Speak-and-Spell.

My word, you are just a big ball of pain aren't you? Your also makin me miss Eastenders coz I have to keep dictating to my baby sister as she types this...so I'll quickly finish this myself so I can get back to talking to my relatives about all the things you've enlightened me they've been up to, the dead ones are gonna be hardest! Seen as I don't have mine stuffed, sitting on a rocking chair in the attic telling me who to attack next like yourself...

Bye bye Norman...
(p.s, a little advice..stop listening to mother)
 
Ah thanks very much, but you know not to type like this, it upsets you know who...
 
Careful, he may loose it and start replying in Klingon "language of the warriors"
 
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