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CrystalGeezer

My secret's my enzyme.
Commencing Operation Diarrhea.

All my dance buddies noticed a Smiths coverband is playing tonight down the street from our joint and figured I'd LOVE to catch that beforehand...I'd rather attend a prayer circle at a Chick-fil-a. So now is "Yeah I'm having bathroom issues, gonna stick near home til I know I can go out. I'll catch up with you guys..."

:D
 

CrystalGeezer

My secret's my enzyme.
Did you know...

If you have a formula. Say you've figured out "If I go dancing, I can drink X amount of beers, take X amount of shots and add X amount of hits, I can dance X amount of songs and be fine to drive...that ALL OF THAT MATH goes out the window when you:

1. Lose 30 pounds.

And

2. Have a cold?

Yeah. NOT driving home tonight. Eff. Can barely stand. Lol.
 

billybu69

Junior Member
Subscriber
Against my better judgement, I just watched a video PBS posted on their website today of a veterinarian in the Tundra castrating a reindeer with his teeth. It's without a doubt the most f***ed up thing I've seen in a long time (sorry, Best Gore) but thankfully it wasn't as graphic as it could have been.

I saw a clip of a tv program recently,where a goat herder somewhere did the same thing with goats. In it he said something like "oh it doesn't hurt them that noise is just something goats do". I thought it very similar sound to what he may have made if I bit his dick off.
 

CrystalGeezer

My secret's my enzyme.
There is nothing not random about this Paul Stanley Folgers commercial that never aired.

 
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CrystalGeezer

My secret's my enzyme.
This photo is fascinating.

prom13.jpg


She wants to be saved so bad but has no idea how amazing her own environment is.
 

CrystalGeezer

My secret's my enzyme.
B4LbzrSIQAAzd2f.jpg
 

CrystalGeezer

My secret's my enzyme.
My next door neighbor whose always been very nice to me trolled me yesterday. I asked him to text a pic of the pin arrangement on his garage door opener so I could program another. He set them all to one side and sent it. When I figured out that wasn't right and asked to see his remote, he reset the pins to open the door and pretended he never did that even though I had photographic proof. :( Then he claimed someone stole his See's Candy gift card and when I told him he could have mine, he was so ashamed from trolling me he wouldn't look at my face and left his remote on the porch. Then made lots of aggressive sounds on his walls.

I never did anything to this guy but be nice.
 

CrystalGeezer

My secret's my enzyme.
I think I'm suddenly hosting Impromptu Christmas Dinner for my friends from Portland and my immediate family and grandparents. I gotta get my ass to Costco. :eek:
 

CrystalGeezer

My secret's my enzyme.
This is why you should never marry pirates with really thick necks and Anime hairstyles.

He looks like Johnny Marr on P90x.
 

CrystalGeezer

My secret's my enzyme.
Just do it.
 

CrystalGeezer

My secret's my enzyme.
My eyeballs and ear canals are on fire, all my muscles hurt, and I'm sweating. I have a fever. A thermometer is one thing I haven't bought for my medicine cabinet yet. I keep forgetting. I also think it's in everyone's best interest if I scale back the grandiose Christmas Hostess Plans, I'm seriously sick. Anyone want two ginormous quiches and a Tuxedo Cake that could feed 20 people? :D

#costcoftw

FYI Tuxedo Cakes are THE BEST. They're like Tiramisu without the powdery coffee layer.
 

realitybites

making lemonade
Subscriber
I just got a message from a guy from Phoenix on POF:

"Hi ;-)
Gorgeous pics
Congrats on being so beautiful
Just sending a quick hello
Enjoy your sweet day
Merry Christmas"

What a strange thing to say. As if I earned it. Or tried. That is like saying congratulations for being so tall.
 

CrystalGeezer

My secret's my enzyme.

CrystalGeezer

My secret's my enzyme.
Looks like Home Depot closed early today. :squiffy: Target it is...again. (They get so much of my money it's ridiculous.)

I'm looking for this thing that holds cords on your desk when you take your laptop away. My boss needs one desperately. I have two I got at Home Depot and FORGOT to pick up the last three times I was there in the last two days like a dumdum, if I can't find it I'll give her one of mine. Two Best Buy's were out of them. Its like a rubber block with nubs that pinch your cord so it doesn't fall down. I'm the King of waiting til the last minute. :D And I need bread and scotch tape. And I feel way better.
 
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